You know I hate those stupid little stereoptypes where it says that 'teenagers' are always searching for themselves and they always say 'no one understands me!,' Dear God, we do say that a lot. Do we ever get tired of self-pity? Does anyone ever get tired of self-pity? When your hurting to the point of non-existance, why not? If no one will love you, you have to, and if you don't, you were long dead before you closed your eyes and tried to find someone else to do what you yourself couldn't. Fuckin' wake up.

I'm hurting so bad right now that all the emotion that I feel I can't hold for fear of insanity. I'm scared that if I let myself feel every event that has just occured I'd think I'd break and God would take my life for fear of disturbance of his other children. His other children? HIS OTHER CHILDREN!?!??!

W h a t ABOUT M E?!?!?!?!

I never thought I had to ask that. I never thought in my life I would get to the point of begging for anyone, anyone to love me. It doesn't matter who.'Beggers can't be choosers.'I just need to feel alive. I need someone to wake me up. Grab me by the shoulders and shake me until I throw up. Until then. Only then.

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