Blink-182. And I'm not trying to think of him because that is his favorite band. He talked about them all the time when we first met. He introduced me to more than just rap and r&b. And I owe him for making me see that there's much more than what I know. You don't know everything, May.

Smile.

Keep me grounded, Romeo.

You were all that I needed and everything that I wanted. And now your silly smile fades in my memory and I breathe. Just breathe.

I still have that blue and white shirt with numbers on the back and the name 'Romeo' written real loud that I bought at Hollister for you. I still have it and it's lying real still in my closet not moving and it should be on your back right now. But it never will be. Romeo How distant. What a name. What's in a name? Oh. Oh. What's in a name?

Smile for me baby. I can see you.

Sing to me again. You and your silly voice. Tell me what you think. Say what you're thinking outloud right now. Shhhhh. Let me hear you breathe. Look at me with those eyes that moved my heart to the bottom of my stomach and back again. Let me feel it. Let it consume me. Consume me.

I miss you with my quiet tears at 9:30. The light from the automatic lights on the porch flow into my room and I think of the summer because we talked after I moved every night over and over again. You called one afternoon complaining because it had been 30 minutes since the last time you heard my voice. The summer. We spent the entire freshmen summer talking. 2 hours every night for the past year and a half. No more talking now.

I can hear you breathing. And it's beautiful.

Your smile fades in the summer.

My hair smells like smoke. And I can't help it. I could never date a girl that smoked. And I'm sorry. Please don't be mad. It's a release. A release and it felt good. I need to feel good; you're gone now and everything just feels bad. Alone. Yeah, a lot of that.

Look to the past and remember a smile
And maybe tonight I can breathe for awhile
I'm not in the scene
I think I'm falling asleep
But then all that it means
Is I'll always be dreaming of you

Thanks Blink-182.
It's on repeat.
Feel this.

Because I hear Tom Delong's voice and Travis Barker's drum set. And I hear him breathing. And I think of the summer. And my heart goes to the bottom of my stomach and back again.