I feel empty
I feel empty right now. I hate that feeling. I hate how when I feel like I'm on top of the world, and I just close my eyes for a moment to take it all in, when I reopen them, it's all gone... all of it.
I just hate that empty feeling I get when all my family and friends are over for a huge get together and everything is just portait hanging in the living room perfect ...and then they leave. & the silence is deafening.
The 4th of July was just another day.
I hate how I can't stop thinking about this one boy. This one boy I haven't brought up yet. This boy that has made me forget Scott in the comfort of his company and his arms. This boy. That I wish I could take more about ...but I'm just not ready to.
I know that I haven't been honest yet. I know that there has been so many haituses since the last time I actually said something personal. I know that I've been talking about a lot of boys because it's time to get over that one boy. The first boy. Yeah, him.
I'm not ready to talk yet. Give me time.